Are you relying on tools, tricks, tactics, gimmicks, and gurus to “help you stay calm”?
Everything from wine to weed, pills to programs, experts to exercises, meditations to mantras, breathwork to bribing?
Have you ever coached yourself in a moment of stress with “Take a deep breath…just take a deep Breath….” while Praying that you will stay calm and not lose your shit?
When I was far enough along on my ReWilding journey, and I made the choice to trade Merlot for Meditation, I made the mistake of taking deep breaths any time I felt triggered or overwhelmed or anxious. I was trying to stop myself from unraveling so that I could be calm, not yell at my kids, or not panic when something went awry. I believed that if I allowed myself to feel anything uncomfortable, that I was regressing or failing at my efforts to be healthy and well. I was ashamed that I might become unhinged if I allowed myself to feel anything.
But here’s the thing—the constant pressure to “just stay calm” becomes nothing more than a glorified way of avoiding and numbing out to avoid the sensations of discomfort.
Bypassing our moment to moment experiences is not healing! It’s bypassing!
Deep breathing is healthy, of course, and a better choice than alcohol or drugs, however when used consistently, especially because we are ashamed of our stress, it prevents us from experiencing our sensations in the moment, and isn’t actually helping us at all.
It becomes nothing more than resistance—a reaction to uncomfortable sensations that actually produces the opposite effect—what we resist persists! You have to feel it, to heal it and release it!
Coping skills don’t heal us; they hold us back. To truly regulate our nervous systems, remove energy blocks, and prevent new blocks, we must maintain a free flowing internal system—in which we stay in a moment, allow ourselves to get intimate with the sympathetic stress response, and effectively release it from our systems rather than storing it. What we don’t shed, we store.
When we can stay present, engaged with our bodies and sensations, and remain neutral in the process, this is how we build our inner resiliency— increasing our nervous system’s threshold for future uncomfortable events or crises.
It’s time to get re-acquainted with your body and the way it works. Learning how to remain in the present moment, with both feet firmly planted, allowing yourself to experience all that the moment is presenting you with-even when it feels uncomfortable, and learning how not to react or run or hide—truly being nonreactive—this is the work!
This is how we reclaim our true selves—relaxed and secure, successful and thriving, and boundlessly joyful and ecstatic.
Still relying on that bottle of Cab each night to chill you out?
Still “just breathe”-ing your way to sanity?
All the things you once thought you couldn’t live without, you will no longer need to rely on.
Want to support your health and wellness? Rewild!
Want to support your kids? Rewild!
Want to support your dreams? Rewild!
Your ReWilding is what the world is waiting for!
Want to learn more? Reach out!
Want a deep dive into self-healing?
Join me for my upcoming ReWilding Retreat in New York’s Catskill Mountains on October 6, 2022!